Falling Down the Rabbit Hole

Wow, today is November first! 2016 has been flying by. Pretty soon we Yankee’s will be slicing turkey, sharing gifts, and be merry as we celebrate the beginning of a new year. For me at least I cannot wait for this year to end. There has been a lot of drama within my life this year. The devil seems to be pricking my voodoo doll constantly. Lets just say it has been a year of too much drama.

This year I’ve kind of felt like Luna Lovegood in Deathly Hollows. In Order of the Phoenix and The Half Blood Prince, Luna is seen as this cheerful soul with little worries. In the final Harry Potter novel the chaos consumes her.  Luna is still Luna, yet she’s somewhat broken and had changed. From discussing politics, faith, right, wrong and so forth I’m now officially  drained. I’ve fought the good fight for sure. I’ve actually told others no instead of going along with the crowd to keep the peace. I’ve stood my ground and stuck to my conscience which has brought a lot of conflict. I do not wish any will ill toward anyone, yet the comments I’ve heard and been told have really struck a cord. I firmly forgive others, yet I cannot seem to forget. I admit that my passion can get the better of me, yet I will not take back what I’ve said. Words are like air. Eventually they drift away.

With all of the issues facing our world today I continue to ask myself this question” Is this what God wants?”

As believers we may sometimes quickly assume how God thinks. We assume that, because some topic may bother us it must also bother Him. We have this idea that terrible things do not happen which is simple false. On Sunday, my dad went to say hello to one of our church’s elder pastors. Likewise to Luna Lovegood, pastor Dan is normally very cheerful, but not this moment, because pastor Dan is a huge Chicago Cubs fanatic. He look sort of sad, telling my father that” sometimes evil does win,” referring to the Cleveland Indians. I think Americans, being so blessed, we sometimes forget that evil lurks all around us. I’m glad that more people are noticing that today, yet I think the division does not help.

Besides worldly problems I’m also dealing with the loss of my grandmother. Today my mom’s parents are no longer with us. It feels so strange. Recently I read from the book of Job. Job was an innocent man, yet his life turned out very unfortunate. He had a firm faith in God, yet even he could not understand exactly why such terrible things were happening to him. Job did nothing wrong. Why do terrible things happen to good people?

 I’ve come to the conclusion that sometimes bad things happen. There does not have to be a reason behind it. We do not have to blame God, family, pets, or even our lucky socks when something terrible happens.  Sometimes evil does win, yet that should not be an excuse to  lose any hope.

I do not know what will happen in 2017. What I do know is there are some good things and some bad things that will probably happen. 2016 has been a rocky, deplorable  year, yet it has reminded me how much support I have. God has given me so many blessings.  I do not have to hide my feelings any longer. At least to me it’s better to show shame than to hide it.  After His crucifixion and resurrection,   Jesus visited the disciples. In a more perfect heavenly form, He still had the scars on his body. We all have scars and we’re all broken in someway or another. The devil wants us to feel ashamed. He wants us to feel as if our sins keep us away from God when that is what can draw us even closer to Him.  Jesus did not enter this world to mock the weak. Jesus came to heal the broken. He tossed away the stones, broke bread, and told His followers to” Take up your cross and follow Me.”

I’ll end this lengthy  post here with this. Thank you very much to everyone who reads my blogs. When I first joined WordPress I was eager to find a site to connect with others.  I’m grateful for all the feedback. It amazes me that I’m able to inspire. That feels so good, nonetheless I may take a short break from blogging or create less blogs than usual. I love sharing my thoughts with all of you, yet I need to restrain myself. I need to have some solace and a lot of fun. Plus I’m working on a novel, so that requires dedication, so take care and God bless 🙂


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